If there is a sun in the solar system of ladies, located in Galaxy Anglophilia, which is smack in the middle of the Universe of Nerdery—if there’s an object of such size and immense gravity that it pulls everything else toward itself and gives it all something to orbit—that sun may lie somewhere near the intersection of Jane Austen, Sherlock Holmes (and especially Sherlock), and Doctor Who. And if this week’s news is correct, we may soon be feeling the pull of that sun: Mark Gatiss (Mycroft Holmes; also John Dashwood from 2008) has confirmed, vaguely, that he might be writing a Jane Austen episode for an upcoming season of Doctor Who.
Batten down the hatches, my friends. It’s all coming together.
Gatiss has written a number of Doctor Who episodes, and I’m sure he doesn’t need my help throwing a story together, but the opportunities here are practically endless. And so I present to you, readers, a selection of possible Austen-oriented plots featuring everyone’s favorite humanoid alien in a police-box spaceship:
– Henry Crawford is actually an alien masquerading as a Regency douchebag; the Doctor arrives to take him out and fly the TARDIS over the ha-ha. Fanny accepts the Doctor’s invitation to travel as his companion, and grows a spine as a result of her newly broadened experiences.
– The Doctor accidentally lands the TARDIS in the middle of the ball at Netherfield, where he accidentally sweeps Mrs. Bennet off her feet. Having realized his error, he accidentally forces Lizzy and Darcy to dance, where they fall in love and accidentally circumvent the entire plot of Pride and Prejudice.
– The Doctor visits Catherine Morland at Northanger Abbey. “I KNEW IT!” she cries.
– John and Mrs. John Dashwood are revealed to be selfish aliens with no regard for the human family unit. The Doctor chases them back to their corner of the universe and restores the Dashwood ladies to their rightful fortune, though they retain their lease on the seaside cottage as well, where the Doctor stops by every time he wants to hear the sound of the sea on Earth.
– Anne Elliot meets the Ood, and gets along with them pretty well.
– Emma Woodhouse attempts to matchmake the Doctor with Miss Bates; he politely and regretfully dashes off to chase the Cybermen out of the strawberry patches at Donwell. He and Mr. Knightley celebrate and commiserate later with a nice glass of Scotch.
What about you? Where do you see the Doctor showing up in Austen?
austenacious 
All of these sound good, but I have a feeling that an Austen-themed Who episode would be more likely to feature Jane herself (as has happened before: see previous episodes in which the Doctor has encountered Shakespeare, Dickens and Agatha Christie). If done well, that could be excellent, but given the usual treatment of female characters on the show, even important historical figures like Elizabeth I, my hopes aren’t particularly high.
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I thought about that, honestly, but making up stories set within the novel sounded like more fun!
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The Anne Elliot plotline is perfection.
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